Turning over the page in an exam and it’s the question you deliberately didn’t practice or study for because there was “no way they’d actually ask us this”
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[audio transcription: bird pushes through the door and begins laughing like a super-villain]
i’ve watched this 20 times now. each time is better than the last
A demon that writes messages on your mirror with blood but they’re useful messages. Like “remember you have yoga at 6 tonight”
I just wanted to use the microwave
Put it back quietly, go to the bathroom, look in the mirror, and practice your surprised face.
Put what back
I’m good at math. U + I = 69
Wait that would mean that I = 59 because U sure are a 10
oh
No. U + I = 145 as the atomic number for Uranium is 92 and the atomic number for I is 53. Cause we got chemistry.
for god’s sake why all these people are so smooth omg
she’s beauty
she’s grace
she punched malfoy in the face
Tracking Service, as helpfully as possible: Your order is out for delivery! It should arrive by 8 PM today!
Me, sitting by the door at 8:12 AM: pakige
looking for an expert on babys out there
im a baby myself… what do u need
hey
what are your weaknesses
thebootydiaries